Invading Grace
by ALlover29
Summary: Angels. That's what they called themselves. The little grace filled souls that invaded earth not that long ago. This story is based off of The Host if you have not read the book or seen the movie do not read this, yet. Dean/Castiel minor Sabriel. Reviews are very welcome.
1. A Prologue

Angels. That's what they called themselves. The little grace filled souls that invaded earth not that long ago.

Only one thing was running through my mind though. _Get them out._ I turned to Amelia and Claire as I heard the Angels coming closer.

"I need you two to get out now. I'll distract them long enough for the both of you to get to a car." I said. Amelia looked at me like I was crazy and grabbed my arm, Claire clinging to her side.

"I'm not leaving here without you! Jimmy, please, we can all make it." She pleaded but I shook my head. There wasn't enough time for us all to make it. I smiled faintly and kissed her for possibly the last time. I pulled back and kneeled in front of my daughter, a tear slipped down her cheek. I wiped it away then pulled her in for a hug.

"Listen to your mother, always listen to her. I love you, baby." I whispered as I pulled away. She nodded shakily as a sob escaped from her throat.

"I love you too daddy." Claire said quietly through tears. The Angels were closer now, too close for comfort.

"Go!" I whispered and ran towards the noise the Angels were making. Then, all of a sudden, I was surrounded. I pulled the silver blade, which I had gotten from one of Angels I had killed, out and held it in front of me. An Angel with dark brown skin came closer with his hands out in front of him, he was trying to calm me down. His eyes looked like they had blue smoke behind the irises, as all the Angels did.

"Now, now. There's no need to hurt anybody. We do not wish to harm you." He said but it sounded false. Like he had rehearsed it over and over again until it sounded somewhat believable. I shakily pointed the blade in his direction and he raised an eyebrow.

"You can't have my body." I hissed at him, "None of you either!" I yelled at the rest of them. There was at least seven of them and only one of me, with the dark skinned Angel being the biggest. A skinny Angel, an older teenager by the look of him, stepped forward and smiled kindly, the kindest I'd seen any of them smile.

"Come on now. We do not wish to harm you, as Uriel said. Please, we can help you." Skinny Angel said. When he said it, it sounded real. Tears started to well up in my eyes and I fixed my grip on the blade.

"You can't help me." I whispered. I lunged forward and stabbed Uriel's shoulder, he grunted in pain and stepped back. I turned on the skinny Angel and slashed at his chest, he stepped out of reach and I shot past him. I ran as fast as my legs and adrenaline could carry me and when I came to a staircase I shot up the steps three at a time, with the Angels on my tail. I came up into a long corridor and turned towards the longest part of it. When I got to the end of it I was met with a dead end. I looked around quickly and saw a door that led to a room, I shot into it and slammed the door shut. I quickly got a chair and put it under the doorknob. I needed to think fast because the chair wasn't going to last very long. I was out of time, options, and ideas. I tucked the Angel blade into my pocket and ran my fingers through my hair.

"I'm gonna die here, oh, wait, no. I'm not gonna die here because they'll just give my body to another Angel before I die, god this sucks." I said hysterically to myself. Then I caught sight of the window to my left and my body immediately sprung into action. I rushed to the window and looked down, I was at least four stories high. I sighed heavily, unlatched the window, and pulled it open. I stuck my head out and looked at the city, I would never see it again.

"I know you're in there Jimmy Novak!" Came the boom of Uriel's voice from the other side of the door. Then he started to ram into the door, shaking me, and the whole building, to the core. I quickly said a prayer to the God I had always believed in and swung my legs out over the window sill. This fall was enough to kill me, it had to be. I breathed in deeply and hardened my gaze. I might as well leave the Angel, who was going to take my body, a memory.

"Listen here, Angel. I love my family more than anything in the world, more than my own life in fact. So, you need to keep my secrets safe, for their sake." I took another shaky breath as Uriel and the others tried to break down the door, "Please, please protect them, they're the only family I have left. God, I hope you actually care enough to actually listen to me." Then the door crashed into the room and there stood Uriel, looking very homicidal.

"You little piece of trash. Your species is so tedious." Uriel hissed. I took a deep breath and launched myself into the air. My life didn't flash before my eyes, I only saw a steady picture of my wife and daughter. I would miss them and they would cry over my not coming home, they wouldn't even have a body to cry over. I closed my eyes, tears slipping out easily.

_We'll meet again sweet wife and daughter of mine. But not too soon, right?_ Was my last thought before I died. Before I hit the concrete. Before my heart stopped beating. Before the Angels carted me away.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Well, at least he won't resist now." Uriel said dryly as they carted the body of Jimmy Novak away to be healed and occupied. Samandriel glared darkly at the dark skinned Angel in front of him.

"Raphael wanted him to be captured alive, Uriel. He's not going to be happy about this." Samandriel growled lowly but Uriel shook it off.

"We'll have Jimmy's body occupied when it's healed and have the Angel occupying him sift through the vessel's memories. It will be fine, Samandriel." Uriel chided. Samandriel huffed out a breath and slumped slightly.

"It's the best we can do in our situation. But you will be the one to tell Raphael of the failed mission." Samandriel said, voice practically dripping in misery. Uriel patted him on the back swiftly.

"We'll put one of our best Angels in Jimmy's body." Uriel said calmly, trying to cover up an emotion that Samandriel didn't know. Samandriel cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"And who would that be?" He asked curiously. Uriel looked at him with a hardened gaze and Samandriel realized the emotion was pure hatred.

"Unfortunately, it's one of the Angels that I never had any care for." Samandriel looked at him with pure curiosity and Uriel huffed slightly.

"Castiel."


	2. New Vessel

This body felt heavy. _My _body felt heavy. It was mine now. My body felt like a pulsing pain. I felt something cold touch my face somewhere near my eyes and the pain immediately receded. They had probably given painkillers to my vessel before I was implanted because it still felt heavy. This vessel must have had a horrible accident before it was healed. I reached out to all my senses to see if they were functioning properly but my mind felt fuzzy and blocked.

"You cannot just expect him to wake up when you need him to. The vessel was badly damaged. You are lucky we were able to fully heal him." A woman's voice sounded out from right beside me as I heard a door open. I heard footsteps coming closer.

"Castiel will be fine. He is strong." A man's voice said to the woman. He sounded like he didn't care about anything pertaining to me or my vessel's health. I didn't feel comfortable with him in the room and I could feel my body tense.

"He hasn't even remembered the vessel's last memory yet. You don't know how he'll take it." The woman was trying to reason with the man this body's memories told me. They continued to argue as they left the room. I felt my body relax entirely when their presences were gone.

I couldn't fully adapt to this body without reliving the death of it. I evened out my breathing and tried to focus. I scanned slowly, not knowing what to expect. _I saw an abandoned building, a hotel by the look and height of it. My vessel had thought it would be safe, no one would look in here for a human._ How wrong he had been. _My vessel started running with two others. Two whispered goodbyes resounded through my ears. Fighting with other Angels and then running, lots of running. He had been so scared and confused. He didn't want to be taken. Then I saw a room and he was jamming the doorknob, the adrenaline was making him shaky. He saw the window and made his decision. _I wanted to scream at him but I was just remembering the memory, not living it, although it felt so real. I barely noticed when my body started to convulse in pain, my chest felt like it was on fire, but I was still stuck in the memory._ He opened the window and swung his legs over, the door being crashed into by Angels. _This was it, he was going to kill himself. _He prayed._

_"Listen here, Angel. I love my family more than anything in the world, more than my own life in fact. So, you need to keep my secrets safe, for their sake." He took a shaky breath, "Please, please protect them, they're the only family I have left. God, I hope you actually care enough to actually listen to me."_

My body stopped convulsing and his words imprinted themselves on my mind. _The Angels crashed into the room and he jumped. I saw a woman and a young girl. We'll meet again sweet wife and daughter of mine. But not too soon, right? He thought. He hit the concrete and everything stopped, everything ended. _My body felt like it was on fire again and I clawed at my chest, trying to do something to alleviate the pain. Then everything went black.

-o-o-o-o-

"Castiel." A soft voice called to me. I lazily opened my eyes to see who was calling me. I saw bright red hair and the soft blue smoke behind big round eyes. I nodded and she smiled kindly. _He smiled kindly, the kindest he'd seen from any of them. _My body stiffened at the memory and I let out a long breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

"Castiel, are you feeling better?" She asked in a serious tone. It didn't match her smile.

I chose my words carefully, "Very much so, thank you for your concern." I said sincerely. She smiled wider at this.

"It's my job. Welcome to Earth, Castiel. My name is Anael but you can call me Anna. I'm your healer." She greeted me. I attempted to sit up but my arms slipped and I fell back onto the metal table. The breath was knocked out of me.

"You'll need time to adjust to your new vessel. He was hurt very badly so you should take it easy." Anna said as she helped me sit up and swing my legs over the side, my hospital gown crinkled with the movement. _I swung my legs over the window sill. _I pushed the memory away.

The human body was truly complex. I looked at my new legs in fascination but kept my face stoic and serious. Anna smiled at me as she took my wrist in her hand and my head tilted to the side on instinct, a look of confusion on my face.

"I'm checking your pulse, Castiel." Anna said. I nodded my head and looked around the room. A warmness flooded to my face, embarrassment. Humans had so many emotions, it was confusing. Then the door burst open and in swept a dark skinned man.

"Anna. Why didn't you tell me Castiel was awake?" He asked and I remembered that voice. My body went rigid and I shied away from him, Anna noticed.

"He's not ready to answer your questions, Uriel." Anna snapped lightly. My head shot up and I looked at him, he looked distastefully back at me.

"Uriel?" I asked weakly. He smiled bitterly at me but turned to Anna.

"When _will _he be ready?" Uriel urged on. Anna sighed heavily. She didn't seem to like Uriel very much, I don't think anyone did.

"He needs time to adjust, as I have told you before. Are you still feeling okay, you're shivering?" Anna directed the question at me. I was shivering and I didn't know why. _He was shaking from the use of adrenaline._ I took a deep breath and mentally shoved the memory down.

"Why was the body damaged so much? Why was he running?" I asked quietly. Anna wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and patted my arm lightly. Uriel tapped his foot against the linoleum floor.

"Your vessel was part of what we call 'The Human Resistance'. We are assuming he was trying to find other humans." Uriel explained. Then I realized why they had saved this vessel.

"You want me to go through his memories and try to find out where others are?" I asked, my speech was steady. I hoped if I had a mission it would distract me from my body's horrible death and the stifling memories it brought to the surface. Uriel nodded once.

"His name was Jimmy Novak. He was originally from Pontiac, Illinois. He escaped the original sweeps of us with two others and has been on the run ever since. He was searching for other humans with-" I stopped and remembered his last wishes. He had been speaking to me directly, he wanted me to keep his family safe. He was hoping I would care about them as much as he did. Uriel stepped closer, a sign for me to complete the thought.

"-his wife, Amelia, and his daughter, Claire." I finished and I immediately felt guilty. I shoved the feeling away and smiled at Anna, "Can I get some actual clothes, please. I feel uncomfortable in this attire." I felt my face color again, the hospital gown was a little revealing. Anna nodded in understanding and left to fetch some clothes. Leaving me alone with Uriel.

"So how _are _you feeling, Castiel?" Uriel asked with a sneer, a dangerous edge to his voice. I brushed it off.

"Fine, thank you." I answered. Uriel stepped closer and I froze, my hands pulling themselves into fists on instinct.

"Really? No bad memories floating around? He took a really bad fall but I'm sure you remember the whole thing, right?" Uriel asked, he sounded like he knew I was keeping something from him. I shook my head slowly.

"I'm perfectly fine." I said, I felt small compared to him. No wonder Jimmy was so scared then.

"Good. But don't keep things from us, Castiel. You won't like me when I'm angry, Jimmy didn't." He punctuated that with a slam of his fist to the metal table, I jumped and leaned away. He smiled cruelly and left the room. Anna came in with some clothes, when she saw me her smile turned into a frown. She set the clothes on the table next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. I looked up into her eyes and calmed down when I saw the soothing smoke behind her eyes. The smoke was the human's perception of our grace.

"Don't listen to Uriel. He's been trying to find the resisting humans for a while now. He gets frustrated." I nodded and she left so I could put the clothes on. When I was done I was wearing a standard suit with a navy blue tie. I called for Anna and she smiled at me when she came in again.

"You look nice." She complimented and my cheeks flushed. I wasn't used to these human emotions yet, but I was probably reacting to flattery.

"Well," Anna clapped her hands together lightly, "let's get you settled in."


	3. The Motions

_I was sitting at the head of a table, Amelia to my right and Claire to my left. A home cooked meal was displayed across the hardwood surface. I turned to Amelia and intertwined our hands together, she smiled brightly back at me._

_"I love you." I said. She tilted her head fondly._

_"I love you too, Jimmy." Amelia replied. I looked over to Claire and smiled._

"_I love you, sweetie." I said to her and she beamed brightly. She grabbed my other hand and squeezed._

"_I love you too, daddy." Then a knock sounded from the front room, then the doorbell rang._

"_I'll get it, you two can start eating." I said as I stood. I went to the front room and opened the door. A woman stood straight and smiled. She was wearing a pantsuit and her hair was tied up in a bun._

"_Can I help you?" I asked, stepping outside. She smiled and stepped forward. Her eyes looked strange as she got closer._

"_We need you." She moved quickly as her arm shot out and grabbed my throat. She lifted me up so my feet were inches off the ground. I gasped for breath and flailed my arms, to no avail. I kicked out and landed a hard blow on her stomach, she let go. She cracked her neck to the side and advanced. I backed away quickly through the still open door and slammed it shut. Locking it before she started to ram into it with her shoulder. I rushed to Amelia and Claire, they had stopped eating._

"_We need to leave." I said to them as a crash sounded in the front room. "Now."_

I woke up in a cold sweat. It had been at least a month since I took this body and the dreams were still coming at full throttle. I found out quickly that they weren't just dreams but actually Jimmy's memories. College graduation, wedding day, Claire's birth, first encounter with an Angel, they were all there. But there was one that had really caught my attention.

_Jimmy had been pumping gas into his car when a man had come up to him. Jimmy looked down to shield his eyes. The stranger held out a folded up piece of paper, Jimmy looked at it as if it was going to bite him. The stranger huffed gruffly and shoved the paper into Jimmy's hand._

"_Take it, Idjit." The man grumbled. Jimmy looked at him in wonder._

"_Your-" Jimmy started._

"_Human? Yeah, but keep your voice down." The man whispered. Jimmy nodded and finished up with the gas, slipping the paper into his pocket._

"_Listen, there are more of us. Don't lose that paper or let _them _get it, alright? I have to go." He grumbled and turned to leave._

"_Wait," Jimmy said and stepped the guy, "What's your name? So I know who to look for." The man looked uneasy and Jimmy thought he wasn't going to reply._

"_Bobby Singer." The man, Bobby, said and walked away._

Everyday the emotions and feelings got stronger. Jimmy had wanted me to take care of his family. I was confused on what to do at this point. Choose family or a man and his family who were strangers? I know two things: 1) This body was affecting my mission and 2) I was having doubts about my family.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Do you have any new information for us, Castiel?" Uriel asked boredly. He asked me the same question everyday, I was bored too.

"Nothing new to report." I lied. I hadn't told Uriel about the human Jimmy had met or the piece of paper. They had disposed of Jimmy's original clothes so the piece of paper was gone for good.

"You haven't had any new information for weeks. Are you having trouble recovering memories?" Uriel asked. I _was _having trouble finding out what was on the paper, but I wasn't going to tell him that.

"No, I've uncovered them all." It wasn't a complete lie.

"Maybe you missed something." Uriel was saying it more to himself than to me. I sighed and stood to leave.

"Maybe another Angel should occupy Jimmy's body. To find information you might have missed." Uriel said and I stopped in place. Another Angel? In Jimmy's body? I felt anger flare up in me. I turned on Uriel.

"Are you assuming I'm not fit for this vessel? That I'm keeping information from you?" I nearly yelled. I_ was_ keeping information away from him but to be doubted by family, even if it was Uriel, hurt. Then the woman from Jimmy's first Angel encounter memory walked in.

"Of course not. On every planet you've served you completed all your missions. No one thinks bad of you, Castiel." The woman said, coming up to me. She stuck her hand out and I shook it.

"Naomi," She introduced herself. "I hope Jimmy's memory doesn't ruin your thoughts about me." She smiled politely. Why was she here?

"I'm assuming you're going to be the one to take this body and research it's memories?" I asked coldly. She looked at me in confusion.

"No, Castiel. I will be the one to take your vessel." Uriel said as he stood. I looked at him in disbelief.

"Has Anna approved this? I would like to speak to her." I said, a dark edge to my voice. Uriel smiled smugly.

"Anna no longer works in this particular facility, she was moved a couple of days ago." Uriel sounded so smug, it made me sick.

"The procedure is tomorrow, please get some sleep," Naomi said as she opened the door. Uriel slipped out of the room. "We'll stand outside the door. For your protection of course." She closed the door after herself. I let out the breath I'd been holding. A different body? Another Angel in control of Jimmy's body? I had to do something. _Please, please protect my family. _Instead of pushing the memory away I pulled it in, my body started to move on it's own. I took a chair and quietly wedged it under the door handle.

"Okay. Now what?" I asked myself. Then my body started to move towards my desk, I picked up a pen and scribbled on a piece of paper. A number, a letter, a number, then another letter.

"Coordinates?" I folded the piece of paper up quickly and stuck it in my pocket.

_I need to get out._ I went over to the window and opened it. I stuck my head out and looked for any footholds. A drainpipe was nailed to the wall about six feet away from the window and I was three stories up. _I could make it._ I pulled myself up onto the window sill and gripped the top of the window to balance myself._ This was crazy, why was I doing this? _I carefully pulled my legs through the window and shakily stood, gripping the top of the window like a lifeline. I went as far as I could on the window and readied myself to jump the six feet to the drainpipe. I took a deep breath and jumped. I got a hollow feeling in my stomach as I tried to grab the pipe. I grabbed the pipe but couldn't get a good grip, I started to fall. I slammed my feet against the wall and I stopped immediately, almost giving myself whiplash. I looked down, I had two stories left. I settled into a pattern. Foot, hand, foot, hand, and repeat. When I reached the end of the drainpipe I hit the ground running.

"Castiel?" I heard a voice call out to me. It sounded like Samandriel, who I had met soon after I was introduced to Earth, but I didn't have time to stop. I ran until my lungs started to burn and my legs started to shake. I looked around and saw a car coming, it slowed down as it came towards me.

"Are you okay?" A woman asked from the car. I smiled at her and she returned it. I looked over her car, no else else besides her. She had a GPS.

"May I borrow your car? It is very important." I said as I gave her my best innocent look. She tilted her head slightly and smiled fondly at me. She opened the car door, got out, and held it for me.

"Of course, the tank's full." She said as I slipped inside. I smiled as I closed the door.

"Thank you, Miss." I said and sped off, leaving her behind.

_I hope you are enjoying this story. Writing from a first person point of view is hard, especially Castiel's. Please review, you know I love it. Enjoy, sweet, sweet readers._


	4. First Meetings

I pulled into a gas station and rolled up to a gas pump. I got out and started to pump the gas. I reached inside the car and pulled out the GPS, taking the piece of paper out of my pocket also. I unfolded the paper and plugged the coordinates into the GPS. The coordinates led into the middle of the desert, this was going to be difficult. I put the GPS back in its place and shoved the paper back in my pocket. I finished with the gas and headed into the main part of the gas station.

"Good morning." The clerk behind the counter said and I smiled so he wouldn't be suspicious. I headed to the back and got three bottles of water. While on my way to the counter I picked up some snacks and a map, so my purchases wouldn't be suspected by the clerk. He just smiled, checked out my purchases, and said goodbye as I was leaving. I tossed everything in the passenger seat and drove, the GPS directing me to my destination.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I pulled over onto the side of the road, this was the closest the road got to the coordinates Bobby gave Jimmy. I still had gas in the car. I reprogrammed the GPS to direct me to the coordinates from this spot and drove slowly off the road. An hour later the car sputtered to a halt and died, and I had drank one water bottle and eaten half the snacks.(Technically Angels didn't need to eat at all but these human vessels craved food.) I shoved some snacks into my pockets, gathered up the two left over water bottles, and picked up the GPS. The sun was almost setting so I wouldn't be baked alive but the heat was still stifling. I headed in the direction the GPS told me to.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I walked all night and a good portion of the next morning until my legs were cramping so bad I could barely walk anymore. I sat down in the shadow of a large miscellaneous rock and took a gulp of water. I took the GPS out of my pocket to check how close I was. About fifty miles. I'd walked less than that already.

"Great! That's just great!" I said to myself, anger tried to flare up but I didn't have enough energy to hang onto it. I put the GPS and water away and wiped my forehead on my sleeve. I was still wearing my suit's shirt and pants, my shirt was soaked through with sweat but at least it was protecting my skin. I rubbed my leg muscles to make the pain subside and got up. I stumbled at first but I soon got a pattern going and before I knew it, the sun was setting again. I tried not to drink too much water but soon I had finished the second bottle and all the snacks were gone. I only had a bottle of water left. I was screwed, no doubt about it. I settled by another rock.

"Jimmy, I'm so sorry. Now your body is going to die out in the desert. I'm so sorry I couldn't get to Amelia and Claire. But at least they'll be safe if I die along with your secrets, right?" I whispered to myself, then I chuckled. "In different circumstances we might've been good friends. Well, I hope at least." I pulled the GPS out with shaky fingers. Fifteen miles. Just that little left to go? I could feel my body giving up, the systems shutting down. I wonder if I'd die of dehydration or starvation first. I'd die either way. If I had just stayed and gone through the procedure I wouldn't be in this situation.

"Then why didn't you?" I asked myself. I didn't have to think about it. Jimmy's memories were stronger than any of my other vessels. His emotions affected me in ways that I had never expected them to. In a way, I had become Jimmy, and going through his memories and reliving his emotions had just spurred it on faster. I rested my head back and my eyelids drooped. Maybe I just needed to sleep it off. Then my eyes snapped open and I stood up shakily, my body was moving on its own. I took a swig of water and it seemed to clear my head just enough, I wasn't going to give up now. Not when I was so close. My body seemed to move on instinct and moved against my will. I trudged on until the GPS made a shrill noise and I pulled it out. The sun was about to rise.

"You have reached your destination." A woman's voice told me. I looked around, nothing stood out to me. Confusion was the first emotion that hit me, then disappointment, and then finally anger. I gave up my life for this?! I threw the GPS on the ground and slammed my foot down again and again. After taking my frustration out on the GPS, now a pile of metal parts, I collapsed onto the ground. I'd probably start going crazy before I died. The sun slowly rose as I laid there. I could feel the sunburn starting on my face as the sun beat down on me relentlessly. I'd been out here for three or four days. After that I lost consciousness. When I woke again it was night time, but that was the only thing I registered before I fell asleep again. I ran out of water the next morning, my chapped lips burning from practically inhaling it. My eyes were dry from dust which made it easier to sleep.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I woke up to voices. Jumbled up speech. How long had I been out here?

"Come on ya idjit, wake up. Don't die on me." A familiar voice said to me as I felt my shoulder shake. I tried to open my eyes but they didn't want to open. I opened my chapped lips.

"Bobby?'' My voice was rougher than usual. My throat was so dry I was surprised anything came out. I felt something splash against my face and I gasped. I nearly choked on the water that was given to me. My eyes flew open and I grabbed for the water supply. Bobby stepped back in surprise but gave me the canteen. I heard other footsteps.

"Why'd ya have to go and give it water?" A woman asked. She sounded annoyed. I let the canteen fall from my hands and looked at the others. There was Bobby, a pretty woman with black hair and a scowl, a dark skinned man, who wore a similar scowl, an older white man with scruff, and a younger man who was incredibly tall. They were all carrying guns except the dark skinned man, he carried a machete. I stayed where I was, I didn't want to make myself look like a threat. The dark skinned man stepped forward and pointed the machete at me.

"Let's kill it." He said. I straightened up on instinct. Bobby stepped closer to me.

"We can't, Gordon." Bobby said gruffly. Gordon looked at me in disgust then to Bobby. Gordon got closer to Bobby.

"And why is that?" He asked Bobby and he turned his head to eye me warily.

"Because I happen to know his wife and kid." Bobby said sadly. Gordon huffed darkly. I sat up straighter.

"Amelia and Claire? They're here? Oh, thank God." I whispered. They were safe. Jimmy didn't die for nothing. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't notice the machete coming towards me. I flinched and waited for the darkness but it never came. I looked up and saw Bobby's gun holding back the machete.

"We'll take it with us." Bobby said as he grabbed my arm and hauled me up. My head spun from the sudden pull. Then he put a piece of cloth over my eyes and we began walking.

We walked for awhile, I heard our footsteps change rhythm, going from dust and sand to hard stone. It got darker too, then, after awhile, it got lighter and I heard other voices. I could feel the stares directed at me. They took the blindfold off my face and I opened my mouth in wonder. They lived in underground caves, carved from the long existent rocks. It was beautiful. Then I saw Amelia coming towards me and I felt my body react against my will.

"Amelia?" I was stunned by the righteous fury on her face and I knew what was coming next. She walked right up to me and slapped my face. My head snapped to the side but I felt no pain. (Angels had a high tolerance for pain.) But she howled in agony as she clutched her hand. The black haired woman from my capture team directed Amelia away and through another tunnel. I looked down in shame, everyone was glaring at me, except Bobby and the tall young man.

"Sam," Bobby said and the tall man perked up. "Take our guest to one of the storage rooms, guard him and feed him. Never leave your post. Got it?" Sam nodded. He gently took my arm and pulled me along. We went down many corridors, then, finally, we got to a dead end with a room off to the side. Sam gently pushed me inside and smiled.

"Stay here." He said then disappeared down the corridor. I looked around the room. There was a bench carved out of rock on one wall and a few support beams, but that was it. Well, it was a storage room. And I was a prisoner. Sam came back minutes later with some soup, water, and bread. I scarfed it down while Sam settled himself outside the room entrance. Sam peeked his head around the door and smiled once again.

"What's your name?" He asked and I was surprised. He was being civil and actually talking to me.

"Castiel." I said warily. He wouldn't stop smiling at me, it was unsettling. I looked away, anywhere but this person being nice to me.

"Nice name." Sam held out a hand in my direction. "I'm Sam Winchester." My gaze traveled to his hand. I walked over and sat down. I reached out and shook his hand.

"Nice to meet you." I murmured. At least he was trying to be nice. Sam smiled and turned away. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad.


	5. New Home

I don't know how long I had been down here, but at least I could talk to Sam when I felt like going crazy. At least he talked back.

I heard other footsteps coming down the corridor and was immediately on guard. No one besides Sam came down here. I heard Sam get up and start talking to whoever had come down. I heard two deep voices answer. I stayed close to the wall as I got close to the entrance.

"We came to kill it." Gordon's voice sounded out. I'd know his voice anywhere.

"Bobby wants him alive." Sam argued back. My breathing was picking up and my grace was stirring.

"Sammy, move out of the way." My head snapped up at the new voice. My grace felt light and close to the surface. I was having trouble containing it. I peeked around the corner to catch a glimpse of the new man. He had short light brown hair, tanned skin, and was well built.

"Dean, Gordon, get out of here." Sam warned. I saw him fix his grip on his gun. Gordon lunged for Sam, knocking his gun away. I gasped and stepped out of the room. I didn't want them to fight amongst themselves.

"It's me you want." I said calmly. "There's no need for you to fight." Gordon punched Sam and they kept fighting.

"Dean, finish it!" Gordon hissed before Sam punched him again. Dean looked at me and pulled something out of his pocket. It was a knife. And a very old one at that. I already knew what was going to happen. Dean rushed forward and stabbed the knife into my chest. They all stopped and waited for my reaction. I looked at Dean curiously, his light green eyes filled with surprise. I didn't feel any pain. I reached up and took the blade by the handle. I pulled it out swiftly. They all looked on in horror.

"What is going on down here?" I heard Bobby yell as he got closer. I looked at the blade in my hand and cringed. I wasn't welcome. Gordon and Dean slipped past Bobby. I saw Dean look back, so did Bobby, then Dean rushed after Gordon. Bobby walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder.

"You okay?" He asked me. I hung my head and shied away from his hand. I held out the knife, handle first and Sam took it from me.

"Yes, thank you for your concern." I muttered darkly. Bobby raised an eyebrow and huffed. I decided to take a chance. "Why are you two being so nice to me?" I looked up to see them staring at me with sadness in their eyes.

"My boyfriend was taken right in front of my eyes. So was Bobby's wife." Sam told me. I was confused. "We know not all of you are that bad. Maybe, with your help, we could get them back?" Sam said. I was dumbfounded. I already went against my family, but taking them from their vessels? But Sam looked hopeful.

"Maybe." I said as I turned into the entrance of my cell.

"Don't you want to wash up?" Bobby asked and I imagined amusement flashing in his eyes. I felt my cheeks heat up and I turned around.

"Yes, please." I said. Bobby chuckled and gestured for me to start walking. We traveled back to the cave where Amelia had slapped me. Everyone stared as we made our way to another connected tunnel. I looked around and saw Dean and Gordon having a heated argument. Dean caught me looking and started to stare. I looked away quickly and smiled to myself. Why was I acting like this?

Bobby directed me to a darker tunnel and we descended. I heard a rushing sound, like water. We came into a cavern with steaming water in large bowl-like holes. Bobby caught me staring in wonder. He pushed some clothes at me and grumbled, "Idjit."

"Here's some clothes. Washroom is that way." He said pointing to yet another cavern. I sighed and took the clothes. Bobby also handed me a used bar of soap and a scratchy towel. I set off into the adjacent cavern and saw a lantern lighting the room. I quickly stripped and got in the water. It was almost scalding but I took my time. When I finished I dried myself off with the towel and pulled on the new clothes, they were a little scratchy but bearable. When I saw Bobby he raised an eyebrow and I tilted my head.

"You look normal." He said. I was learning he was bad with compliments. I smiled at him.

"Thank you." I replied as I handed back the soap and towel. He took them and placed them into a box by the entrance that I hadn't noticed before. We walked out of the room and back to the main cavern. Everyone was still staring but I didn't pay them any mind.

"So," Bobby started, "Your name's Castiel?" I nodded.

"That's kind of a mouth full. Mind if we call you...Cas?" He asked. I stopped in my tracks in shock.

"We?" I asked. Bobby had stopped with me.

"While you were cleaning up I had a chat with Dean. He's the one that brought up the nickname." I felt my grace flutter at the name. What was wrong with me?

"Sure, I like it." Bobby looked surprised but there was a glint in his eye. I started to walk again. We walked in complete silence all the way to my cell. Sam was waiting by the entrance and smiled as we came closer.

"Feeling better, Cas?" He asked. The nickname was spreading quickly. I nodded and slipped into my cell. A small pillow was laying on the bench. I was suddenly aware of how sore my body really was and I collapsed on the bench and fell asleep in moments.


	6. The Visits

I was sitting in the hallway with Sam. He was always asking about the other planets I had lived on. He told me I was quite the storyteller.

I heard the sound of footsteps and turned towards the sound, thinking it was Bobby. I was shocked when Amelia came into my field of vision. I hadn't seen her since she had slapped me, which had been about a month ago. I didn't blame her for avoiding me. Sam tensed up.

"Can I talk to him alone?" She asked Sam. Sam looked as if he was going to tell her off but I stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, he relaxed instantly. That was because my grace had a calming effect. Now that I was eating regularly I was up to full power.

"Of course." I said to her. Sam walked off down the hallway, looked behind himself for a second, then disappeared around the corner. Amelia glared at me, no mercy in her eyes.

"I'm sor-" I started to say but she raised her hand. I flinched but the hand never moved from its place.

"Don't say that." She said around a sniffle. I nodded in understanding. She lowered her hand and took deep breaths.

"Is he dead? Or is he in there with you?" She asked. She cast her eyes down, not wanting to face the truth. Jimmy's body wanted to reach out and comfort her but that wasn't an option.

"He died that night. Our healers were very thorough and his body was healed fully. He killed himself to protect you and Claire." We stood in silence for a long moment. Then her hands shot out and grabbed the front of my shirt. I stood there, feigning calm.

"Why did he have to go and do that?" She sobbed.

"He was a great man. An even better husband and father." I told her. "He loved you both too much to put you in harms way." She looked at me then, a touch of sympathy in her reddened eyes.

"But you still have his memories." She stated. I chuckled.

"I'm different. Being in Jimmy's body changed my views on a lot of things. He is very persuasive." I smiled fondly at her. She let go of my shirt and stepped away. I started to lean after her but stopped myself, it wasn't appropriate.

"I'll never love you." She stated bluntly. It hit me hard. "But I'm willing to try to get along with you. For now." With that she turned off down the hallway and disappeared. Sam peeked around the corner and walked to me. He put a hand on my shoulder and beamed at me.

"So," Sam started, changing the subject, "This cloud planet you were on, you actually had wings?" With that we settled back down and I kept telling Sam about my other planet experiences.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I had been with the Human Resistance for about a month and a half. I was sitting in the hallway with Bobby this time when Claire raced around the corner of my hallway. I barely had time to react before she barreled into me, crushing me in a hug. She then turned suddenly to Bobby and pointed menacingly.

"I wasn't here." She hissed. Bobby held up his hands.

"I didn't see anything." He said calmly. She turned back to me.

"Mom told me everything. I know you're not my father. But let's be friends okay?" I nodded slowly, stunned into silence. She kissed my cheek quickly and sped off down the hallway. I looked after her for a moment then turned to Bobby.

"What just happened?" I asked. Confusion swirled around in my head and Bobby smiled.

"She has a lot of energy. Kids are a handful." Bobby stated. I chuckled.

"Jimmy never had a problem with her." I said more to myself than to Bobby. Jimmy's memories of Claire were always good and very fatherly, he was a great parent. _And my kind forced him to kill himself. He'll never see his family until they die. _I thought and shuddered. What would happen to this body if one or both of them were to die?

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

It was about a week after Claire's flamboyant and short visit when I realized it.

"I'll be right back. Gordon's gone and messed something up." Bobby said. I nodded and relaxed against the wall. Bobby would be back soon and I could defend myself. It was quiet when Bobby left.

That was when I realized I was lonely. The only Angel in a hornet's nest of humans. The emotions filled my head, thoughts rammed against my skull. I realized I was having the human equivalent of a panic attack. And I didn't know what to do. I felt so helpless. The walls seemed like they were shaking but were they really? I wanted desperately to stop any sounds from coming out of my mouth but I felt so out of control. My head lolled and I was about to scream in frustration when I felt something warm tilt my head up. The heat sent tingles through me and grounded my head. Green eyes stared into my own blue. I knew those eyes.

I moved faster than I thought I could, pulling a silver blade out of thin air. I pressed it expertly against Dean's neck. Dean backed off a little, his hand not touching my face anymore.

"Jeez, Cas. I didn't mean to scare you." Dean tried to reassure me. My mind was still a little fuzzy but this man had tried to kill me.(Angels tend to hold grudges, even though we claim to be a peaceful species.)

"You tried to kill me." I said dumbly. We both knew he had but I was reeling from after effects. Dean had the decency to look guilty and sorry.

"Sorry. Gordon was very convincing. Not a good excuse, I know, but can you get rid of the knife?" Dean asked sheepishly. I looked at the silver blade and felt a blush creep into my cheeks. My head had cleared and I was embarrassed at my display. The blade disappeared and Dean seemed to relax.

"What are you doing here?" I asked while scooting as far away from him as possible. Dean followed my movements with his eyes but stayed where he was. He looked at me with an emotion I couldn't describe.

"Well, I was actually looking for Sam. But I heard you crying," I touched my cheek and felt the watery drops. "I can't stand it when somebody cries." Dean said huskily, like he himself was holding back tears. I tilted my head at him and he looked surprised.

"Stop staring at me." I said bluntly, heat flushing my face. Dean's own face went bright red and he sputtered out an apology.

"Sorry. About this. About everything. And sorry I tried to kill you, Gordon's an idiot." I chuckled at the last part and scooted back towards Dean. A daring move. But Dean hardly noticed.

"You probably didn't count on Gordon attacking Sam, did you?" I asked, my humor slipping away quickly. Sam was my friend, you stand up for friends. Dean's face went dark and I felt bad instantly.

"No. No I didn't. Sam's my little brother, I'm supposed to care for and protect him. I was stupid." Dean face darken even more, if that was possible. I sighed and stretched out my hand to him.

"Sam doesn't blame you, he hates Gordon too. He told me. Truce?" I always got straight to the point when I wanted to. Dean brighten and smiled a brilliant white smile, I couldn't help but smile back. He wrapped his hand around mine and heat coursed up my arm, I slowly pulled away.

"You should get out more." Dean said. He got up from the floor and went to walk out. He turned and sent a smirk in my direction. "See ya around." With that he slunk out of the room and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. It concerned me what that man's presence did to me. I actually missed the feel of his skin on my hand.


	7. Working Man

"Up and at 'em, sunshine!" I was immediately awake. Bobby was standing over me.

"Time to pay your dues." He huffed as he pulled me up. I groaned but acquiesced control. I looked at him through blurry eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked. Bobby's eyes got a mischievous look.

"Today, you start working in the kitchen." Then I realized what that look meant. It was the 'I talked to Dean about you' look. I was annoyed at Dean for talking to Bobby about my needing to 'get out'. Then fear started to creep up my spine. Everyone would come to the kitchen. People who hated my kind and hated me even more. Bobby must have seen it in my eyes because he patted me on the shoulder.

"Don't worry, Cas. It's just to get them used to seeing you around." Bobby said as he looked at the watch on his wrist. "And it's about time to eat." With this Bobby exited swiftly with me trailing behind.

Kitchen work is easy. Trying to be nice to people who want to skin me alive is hard.

I was cleaning up the kitchen after lunch when Dean walked up to the counter and smirked. I turned away from him, pay back for having Bobby give me a job, and I heard him sigh. I wasn't mad anymore, just drained.

"Cas," I shivered at his use of my nickname. "Has anyone given you a hard time?" I turned to him and smiled a small smile.

"No one has talked to me directly if that is what you mean." I said and Dean's face darkened.

"People can't keep their comments to themselves." He muttered. I chuckled.

"Neither can you." I said quietly. I was overstepping my boundaries but Dean just smiled.

"At least I'm nice about it." With that he nodded and walked off. I sighed heavily as my heart slowed down. My grace was stirring just below my skin and it unsettled me. It only happened around Dean. I saw Bobby walk in.

"I'm going to go wash up. Is that okay?" I asked him. He looked at me weird.

"Of course you can ya Idjit. You're not a prisoner." He grumbled. I didn't waste anytime and sped off to the washroom. No one was around so I got a bar of soap, stripped and got in. I pulled my clothes in with me so I could clean them too. I took my time, letting the warm water clean every pore and soak my clothes. I washed my clothes first and laid them out to dry. Then I scrubbed myself down until my skin felt raw and the dirt was just a memory. I got out and dried off with a towel from the box by the entrance. I slipped on my now clean clothes and sighed in relief.

I turned and came face to face with Gordon. I was so stunned that I didn't react when he pushed me backward. I flailed as I realized what was happening. Gordon still hung on to me when we fell back into one of the baths. My head went under and that was when I started to panic. I _was_ technically stronger than Gordon but he had the element of surprise. My head resurfaced and I gasped in a breath before Gordon pushed it back into the water. I looked up at him through distorted water images and saw a cruel smirk on his face. My vision started to blur and my grace started to stir itself up. I saw the look of surprise on his face as the water we were in started to bubble angrily. Then I saw the panic as he took in my glowing eyes. He let go and scrambled out of the bath as I rose to the surface. I barely paid attention to the water I had inhaled as I focussed on him. He raised his arms to defend himself. I knocked them away and backhanded his face. His head snapped to the side and he crumpled to the floor, unconscious, but alive. I could have done worse.

I heard footsteps approaching quickly, they were running. I turned and pulled my knife out of thin air to protect myself. My grace was starting to shine through, it was dangerous to humans. I saw Bobby and Dean through a blue haze, they both had guns. Were they threatening me?

"Cas, it's okay now. Put the knife down." Dean said calmly, his face showing no emotion. The guns weren't pointed at me. I tilted my head to the side and Dean's mask fell. I could only imagine what he was seeing right now. An Angel at full power, almost out of control, with glowing blue eyes. A true Angel in all its glory.

"He should not have attacked." I said and I barely recognized my own voice. It sounded like many voices trying to talk over one another but in unison at the same time. I saw Dean's eyes grow wide and his mouth fall open in shock. Dean handed his gun to Bobby and stepped closer still, I tensed up. What was this human doing?

"Cas, it's okay, the guy deserved it. He's a jerk who likes killing." Dean said calmly, smiling his charming smile as he got closer. My grace longed to reach out but I kept it inside. Dean was right in front of me now and he put his hand on mine, the one holding the knife.

"You don't need that." With that my blade disappeared back into thin air and I slumped into Dean. Then my grace was ready to burst. I gasped and grabbed Dean's shoulder.

"Dean, my grace, it could kill all of you if I let it out." I grimaced in pain and clenched my hand harder into Dean's solid shoulder.

"Bobby, get out of here. And take Gordon with you." The last sentence was said with disgust. After Bobby was able to haul Gordon's limp body away Dean turned back to me.

"How can we contain your grace." He asked seriously. I chuckled through a lash of pain.

"You can't, it's pure energy. It can wipe out everybody in the caves." I sucked in a breath as my control on my grace faltered. I was going to run out of energy fast while keeping my grace in check.

"Then let's both take some." Dean said. I pulled away to look at him. It was a crazy idea. It could kill him.

"No, I won't let you kill yourself." I said and tried to pull away. He _was _the main reason my grace did this. Dean wouldn't let go. His touch on my wrist made my control slip. I grabbed onto Dean's shoulder again and then white light was everywhere, I cried out as the pain seared through me.

_Please don't be dead. _I thought to Dean right before I passed out.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Cas." A voice whispered to me. I groaned and shied away from the insistent drone. "Cas!" I bolted upright as my name was yelled. Had that been the last thing Dean said? Was he dead?

"Oh God, please don't let him be dead!" I whispered loudly. I was shaking badly, I held up my hands to watch them tremble. Then a firm, warm hand was placed over one of my quaking ones and I looked up to see the face I truly wanted to see. Dean was alive, or we were both dead.

"Are we dead?" I asked out loud and Dean smiled charmingly. He shook his head and nodded to something else. I looked around and saw other people standing around. Bobby, Sam, and the white man from my capture team(Sam told me that was his father, John, when we had been talking in my cell). John was also the doctor. Then I looked over to the other table and saw Gordon, glaring at me. I immediately looked away and started to stare at the floor.

"Cas, what happened down there?" Dean asked and I tilted my head as I looked at him. So Gordon wasn't talking, or they were trying to get my side of the story. I peeked over to Gordon and sighed. I didn't want them to fight amongst themselves because of me.

"I lost control on my grace and Gordon just happened to be down there." I lied. I saw Gordon sit up straighter. Everyone looked skeptical.

"When me and Bobby came down you said 'he should not have attacked', and he was lying on the floor." Dean saw right through my lie. I wasn't going to give up easily. I stayed silent for awhile as Dean kept asking questions, he eventually gave up. I looked at him in confusion.

"How are you still alive? My grace should have killed you but you seem unscathed." I asked. My grace felt calm and collected. Dean rubbed a hand across his cheek.

"I have no idea, but after you passed out I carried you back here. Whatever was in your grace gave me, like, Angel adrenaline. I carried you here no problem." Dean said with pride. My lip quirks up a little at this.

"He looked crazy." Bobby huffed as he glared silently at Gordon. Gordon kept quiet.

"And I got a souvenir." Dean sounded sarcastic as he said it. I quietly watched as he pulled his sleeve up to reveal his shoulder. A red handprint stood out from his top left bicep. I stared blatantly. That was why my grace was so calm right now. Some of my grace was inside Dean now. I had bonded with a human. This was going to be interesting.


	8. Half Hearted

"Gordon, if I ever see you near Cas again, I'll choke you to death." Dean practically growled. My clothes were still soaked from falling in the water, it was like ice on my skin. I shivered and slid off the examining table. I walked off into the tunnels in the direction of my cell. Dean caught up to me after awhile.

"Cas, we don't think you should stay in the storage area anymore." By 'we' I knew he meant 'I'. "You can stay in my room, if you want." Was Dean blushing? I smiled to myself.

"Of course Dean, if that will appease you." I bit out as a hard shiver rocked my body. Dean frowned.

"You can borrow some of my clothes too." Dean put his hand on my elbow and steered me to his room. It was a usual carved out room with clothes everywhere, various other items, and two mattresses. Each one on opposite sides of the room.

"Who else shares this room with you?" An edge to my voice. Dean didn't seem to notice as he searched for clean clothes.

"Sam usually sleeps in here but you can use his bed." I relaxed instantly. After a while of just standing there awkwardly Dean stood up and presented me with clothes. I sighed in relief as Dean turned around, trying to give me some privacy. I quickly stripped and shoved the clothes on. They were a little baggy but fit otherwise. I looked at the shirt and frowned.

"Dean, what is AC DC?" When I looked up Dean was staring at me with wide eyes and an agape mouth.

"You've never heard of AC DC?" Dean gasped in horror. I shied away and played with the hem of the borrowed shirt. Dean looked like he was about to go into a long lecture but was stopped when Bobby ran in. His face serious and worried.

"Amelia's been hurt." He said, his tone dry. I immediately rushed out when it sunk in and ran towards the medical hall I had just come from earlier. Dean was right behind me. I heard gasps of pain and I found the strength to run faster. I whipped into the room the sounds were emanating from and came to face a gruesome sight. Amelia had a silver blade protruding from her chest. I rushed to her but Andy and Sam held me back. I'd only met Andy the previous day.

"Get off me! Let me see her!" I shouted but they still held me back. I looked at Amelia as she made eye contact and saw the calmness in her eyes.

"Amelia, why?" I asked as a tear fell down her cheek. They let me go then and I stood by her. She held up a shaky hand and I took it gently into my own.

"Jimmy and I were happy. We were living a perfect life until all this happened. But I never stopped loving him." She looked directly at me and asked, "He still loved me until the very end, right?" I sobbed and kissed her hand. She too started to sob.

"Of course he did, Amelia. He was thinking of you and Claire right before-" I was cut off as she surged up and locked our lips together. But it didn't feel the same, there was no spark or love. I didn't love her, neither did this body. I pulled back and she looked straight in my eyes. I saw what she wanted, so I wrapped my hand around the blade handle and pulled it out quickly. She gasped as she almost fell back but I caught her arms. I laid her down slowly and placed a hand over her heart. The blade had done too much damage, I couldn't heal it.

"Do it." She said. I sobbed and gripped her shirt in my fist. I focussed my energy around her heart, alleviating her pain, then stopping her heart completely. I gasped as I gathered her energy inside me. She finally got what she wanted, she got to be with Jimmy. I clenched my teeth together and fell to my knees. Blood covered my hand. I didn't realize I was screaming until people tried to calm me, then I screamed even more. Surrounded by people I didn't know. I panicked and ran to my original cell. Boxes packed the dirt cavern, but that didn't stop me. I followed the maze of boxes and found myself a tiny corner. And I sat there.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

They didn't find me for awhile. I suspected it was either to give me space or they actually couldn't find me. Or maybe they didn't care. But I didn't care either so it was okay.

Bobby found me first. At first he tried to console me but I wouldn't respond, then he resorted to actually begging me to talk, but I wouldn't. He left after that and only came back to give me food. I didn't eat any of it. That was when they started to show real panic. I was convinced they were holding meetings to just talk about ways to get me out of my head. Then they started sending people in.

First, it was Sam.

"Hey, Cas." He said as he sat down beside me. I didn't acknowledge him. He sighed and just sat down beside me. My stomach rumbled and I heard the sound of a metal tray being pushed towards me. My body yearned for food but I resisted.

"Cas, we're worried about you. You can get past this, we'll help you." He begged. _No one can help me. _I thought. Sam sat with me, talking about anything and trying to get me to talk. It didn't work and he soon left, leaving the food behind. I lifted my head a little to stare at the food. Then I saw Amelia's eyes as she died and I gasped at the feeling of loss and anger filled my heart. I lept for the food and threw it across the room. I picked up the metal food tray and hit it against the wall again and again. I only stopped when the tray was unrecognizable and my energy was drained. I let the disfigured tray fall to the dirt floor and slumped into the corner once again.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

The second time, it was Claire.

When she walked in, my heart felt like it was burning. She sat beside me with a grim expression and looked at me.

"I heard you wouldn't eat. Or talk." She said and she sounded much older than she should have. I held in a sob and looked at her. She had tears in her eyes too.

"She was my mom. I knew her for my whole life. But you've only known her since you took my dad's body." She sobbed as her hands clenched into fists, "You have no right to feel sad! Not when you didn't know her for as long as dad and I did. So suck it up because you didn't really love her! You were clinging to a memory." She shouted. I flinched and looked away, I knew she was right.

"You just felt responsible because my dad died that way. So I don't want to hear it. I just don't." She said hoarsely and walked out of sight behind the boxes. I cried like I'd never cried before that night.

_If I didn't love Amelia, then why do I feel so empty? _I thought.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Others came and went, I never said a word. And the no eating was starting to take its toll. I could barely keep my eyes open and I started to sleep more than not. They didn't care if I didn't talk anymore, they were more worried about my fasting.

Then one day I opened my eyes to see Dean sitting in front of me. I jumped a little but didn't move from my spot. Dean looked like he hadn't slept in a long time, bags hung under his eyes.

"Have you been worrying about me?" I asked hoarsely, a small smile playing on my lips. My voice was scratchy from its non-use. It wasn't until after I spoke that I realized I had just talked. Dean's face lit up a little when he realized it too. Anything seemed possible when Dean was around.

"Castiel, you're killing yourself. We don't want you to die, I sure as heck don't." He said and reached his hand out to me. I was hit by the way he said my full name. I tilted my head at him as his hand intertwined itself with mine. I hadn't let anyone else touch me, let alone hold my hand. I sighed, but it came out like a sob.

"I didn't love her. So, why do I feel so empty inside?" I asked him. He scooted closer and held my hand tighter.

"It's called losing a friend, Cas. It's what we're all feeling towards you." Dean murmured. I raised my head slowly and sobbed again. I had been hurting the people I cared about. And all it took was Dean and his ridiculous voice to make me realize.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you guys. You've been more than friends to me. Why couldn't I-?" I was cut off as Dean's lips crushed against mine. I felt the spark I had been missing with Amelia. I could feel the sliver of grace Dean had in him under his lips. It actually felt like magic. Everything sped up and everything slowed down, it was the perfect feeling. And I kissed Dean back. Although I had never kissed anyone, besides Amelia, this body knew how and I went with it. We eventually broke apart, panting with smiles on our faces.

"-see it before?" I finished. Dean looked at me with his big green eyes in pure adoration, it made my heart swell.

"Where have you been all my life?" Dean asked me and smiled wider.

"In space." I answered and Dean sighed. He leaned forward and rested his forehead on my shoulder. I hugged him closer.

"You're too literal for your own good." He whispered. I smiled and drank this moment in, the perfect simplicity of it all.


	9. New Allies

After my tantrum, as Dean had called it, I started to work in the kitchen again. This time people would actually try to talk to me. Dean made it his personal goal to get me to talk as much as possible.

I was cleaning the counter when I heard someone walk in. I looked up to greet them but stopped when I saw Gordon. I hadn't seen much of him after he tried to kill me.

"Hello, Gordon. Can I get you anything?" I asked politely. Gordon grimaced and stepped closer, he kept wringing his hands. He came all the way up to the counter and I leaned away. He wouldn't look at me.

"Look," Gordon began, "I'm sorry about trying to kill you, okay? I thought I was doing the right thing but then I got my butt handed to me when you went full Angel. I made a mistake, okay?" I wondered what possessed him to apologize but I smiled anyway. It _would_ be like Dean to threaten someone.

"Apology accepted." I said and he finally looked at me. He was about to say something when Bobby rushed in with the same look he had with Amelia. I immediately thought if Dean had went on a raid today and my heart sunk into my stomach. Dean had. I jumped over the counter, running faster than I had for Amelia, and sped off to the medical hall. I heard a woman screaming 'I can't see'. I turned into the occupied room and saw Dean standing by the woman. He turned to me as I ran in and I hugged him tightly.

"You're okay, thank God." I whispered to him. The woman stopped screaming and I finally looked at her. I pushed Dean away gently. The woman's eyes had been burnt out, only Angels could do that.

"What the heck is the Angel doing here?" She yelled and Dean pulled me away from her. I realized this was the woman that had helped Amelia after she had slapped me.

"Pamela, he can help you." Dean said as Bobby and Sam walked in. Sam smiled at me and I faintly smiled back.

"I don't want his help." She hissed. I looked at Dean and he backed away from Pamela. I stepped towards her.

"Pamela, I can help you." I said calmly. She was silent. I reached out to her with my grace to calm her and she relaxed.

"There are three people in here capable of killing me if I try anything. I won't fight back. I won't hurt you." I stepped closer and she straightened up slightly.

"Fine." She grumbled. I reached out and put a hand over her eyes. She hissed in pain as I brushed against the sensitive skin around her eyes. I took away her pain and she sighed. I looked back at the others.

"You guys should cover your eyes." I said. They hurriedly covered their eyes and I turned back to Pamela. I put a hand on the back of her head to steady her, keeping my hand over her eyes. She tensed.

"Pamela, I need you to keep your eyes open or I can't heal them, okay?" She nodded. I took a deep breath and focussed on my grace. I imagined my grace seeping into her eyes and I felt my eyes start to glow. Then a light exploded from my body and bathed the room in white. Then it was gone and I told the others to open their eyes. I looked to Pamela and kept my hand over her eyes.

"Pamela, now I need you to close your eyes." I felt her eyelashes brush against my hand as she closed them. I took my hand away and saw no trace of singed flesh.

"Now, open them slowly." I whispered. Her eyelids fluttered and slowly opened. Brown irises met my blue ones and I smiled. She smiled at me and felt her face.

"I can see!" She squealed happily. Sam rushed forward and hugged her. I smiled at the display. Dean came over and hugged me.

"That was awesome." Dean said. His words took a moment to settle in. I pulled back suddenly.

"You didn't cover your eyes?" I whispered hoarsely. He tried to pull me closer but I pulled away from him completely.

"I figured I didn't need to because some of your grace was in me. Calm down, I'm okay." He reached for me but I shied away. I was furious. Pamela, Sam, and Bobby were staring at us.

"That was stupid!" I screamed at him and I saw him give into his anger. His jaw tightened and he squared himself up to me.

"I just assumed-" He started but I interrupted him.

"You assumed? Never assume anything about me! That light could have burned out your eyes just like Pamela. I wouldn't be able to heal you if I did it, it's impossible. I can't heal anything that I inflict!" I yelled and I saw him deflate.

"Cas, I'm sorry!" Dean yelled after me as I ran away down the tunnel. Too many emotions were clashing in my head. I needed to get away. _I could have hurt him._ I thought. Then I ran into somebody.

"I'm sorry." I said quickly and went to keep running when a hand stopped me. It was Sam and Dean's father.

"I'm sorry, sir." I said. He smiled and pulled me into a room. I was too confused to do anything. He put a finger to his lips and stepped out of the room. I heard fast footsteps approaching.

"Dad! Have you seen Cas? I made a mistake." I heard his voice crack and I longed to reach out to him. The emotions were calming down.

"Calm down, son. What exact mistake did you make?" John asked. I was confused at what John was doing. I heard Dean sigh and I imagined him rubbing the back of his neck.

"I didn't listen to Cas, Dad. He told me to do something and I didn't listen." Dean's voice definitely broke that time and I heard John pat his shoulder.

"I'm sure Cas will forgive you. He's the best thing that ever happened to you." John said loudly. He was talking to me.

"Thanks Dad, but I have to go find him." Dean said, then the footsteps took off and John came back in. He smiled at me.

"It's true you know. That boy hasn't been right ever since his mom died. Moping around since he was four, keeping too many responsibilities on his shoulders. Then you come along and he's bright and cheery for the first time." John said. His eyes were cloudy.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Mr. Winchester." I said sadly. I didn't know that about Dean. John smiled at me.

"Call me John. Mr. Winchester makes me feel old. Now go apologize, we both know you will." He said. I nodded and went to walk out.

"And take care of my boy, Castiel. If you don't I might have to kill ya." He warned. I turned to him.

"I would never hurt him." I said and took off running before I said too much. I ran into the main plaza and saw Dean talking to a redhead.(That was Charlie, Sam had introduced me in one of my first weeks here.) I saw her point at me and Dean turned around. He ran towards me and looked at me with guilt shining clear in his eyes.

"I'm sorry Cas. I should have listened to you." He whispered in my ear as I let him pull me close. I hugged him closer.

"No, I'm sorry. I was just scared of hurting you. Afraid of losing you." I answered back. Dean pulled back and looked into my eyes.

"Don't my eyes disturb you?" I asked, being my usual blunt self. Dean looked shocked for a moment then he smiled at me. He made a point to look directly into my eyes.

"No, what made you think that?" He asked.

"They aren't normal." I said and finally looked away from his intense gaze. Dean tilted my head up with his fingers and continued to look deeply into my eyes. Like he was actually looking at my grace. Maybe my grace in him made him able to truly see it.

"They're beautiful." He said and connected our lips together. I ran my hands up his arms and gripped his left shoulder with my left hand, he tightened his arms around me. I felt safe for the first time in a long time.


	10. Old Acquaintance

But that safety didn't last long.

I hugged my arms around myself as I looked at the makeshift coffin. Dean put an arm around my shoulders and pulled me against him. Claire stood next to me, staying silent. I could feel the sun on my back as we all just stared. Then Bobby and John started to chant in Latin. A prayer for Amelia. I felt sobs wrack Claire as she clutched to my side and Dean rubbing circles into my back in comfort. I pulled them both closer. Then a sudden sensation went through me and I had to pull away from them. I saw a dark figure and immediately pulled out my blade. I saw Andy coming at me, a panicked look on his face. I opened my mouth to ask him what was going on but was cut off by a loud bang. A gunshot. Andy had a stunned look on his face as he stumbled towards me. Then he suddenly toppled over, a large red spot spreading on his back.

"Everyone get down!" I yelled. Bobby yelled the same and everyone ran for cover. I ran to where the figure had been. I turned and saw the one person I had never expected. Uriel held an older looking gun at level with my chest.

"How did you find us?" I asked as I took cover behind one of the large rocks, Uriel did the same. I heard him laugh.

"Us? Oh, Castiel, you have strayed so far from the destined path." He yelled back. I peeked around the corner and he shot again, hitting a rock behind mine. I crept the other way around the rock and kept silent.

"What would Raphael think of you now? He'd be so disappointed." I stiffened slightly at the name but kept going. I reached Uriel's rock and slashed at his unsuspecting arm, disarming him. He grunted in pain and lunged for me. I sidestepped and hit him hard in the neck, enough to knock an Angel out. He was too slow. I had a sudden vision of stabbing him with my Angel blade, seeing the blue light fade from his eyes. I would be protecting the people I cared about wouldn't I? _Wouldn't I?_ Then Dean was there, wrenching me from my own mind. _No, I have to act more civil than that._ Dean and I carried Uriel's form to the others. They said they wanted me to kill him but Bobby hushed them.

"It's Cas' choice." He said, I was stunned. Leave a dangerous Angel under my command? Did he trust me this much? I nodded to him in thanks.

"Take him to a storage cell. Don't give him food or water. Stay away from him at all costs. I'll be down shortly to take his blade away." They set to work immediately. Bobby patted me on the back.

"Nice, taking charge. You're a born leader." He said gruffly and maybe just a little sarcastically. I frowned and urged anyone else around to get back underground. How had he found us? _When did it become US?_ A deep, ancient voice said in my head. A voice that I remembered faintly but couldn't remember who it was exactly. I shook it away and sealed up the entrance to our home.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

It was a little weird traveling back to my old cell. When I came around the corner I saw Sam and Bobby, guns trained on the entrance to Uriel's cell.

"Is he awake?" I asked. Sam turned his head to look at me and nodded. He had bags under his eyes, they were rimmed red. He had been crying.

"Just woke up, and he won't stop staring." Sam rolled his shoulders in discomfort, the gun looked heavy in his hands. I put my hand on the muzzle of his gun and pointed it down, I did the same with Bobby's. I walked into the cell and frowned at the Angel in front of me. Uriel was slumped against the wall. I heard Uriel growl as I stepped closer.

"How did you find us?" I asked calmly. Uriel looked weak so I knelt down beside him. I grabbed his arm and I felt the blade in his sleeve. Maybe he wasn't so weak after all. I ripped his sleeve and held the blade out to Sam, he took it gently.

"How do you think?" Uriel choked out. I tilted my head.

"Humor me." I warned and a look of fear shone in Uriel's eyes. He had no way of protecting himself, he shouldn't get me angry.

"The GPS had a tracker in it, Castiel. But it took forever to track it. When I had finally found the location, no one cared. They thought you were dead so they stopped looking." I heard Sam and Bobby move behind me. I looked back at them.

"You guys used to be friends?" Bobby asked and I stiffened. Uriel coughed out what sounded like a laugh.

"Where would you get that thought?" I asked him. He looked down in embarrassment then back up.

"Well, he said no one else cared if you were alive or dead. Implying he does." Uriel choked out more laughter. I looked at him.

"More like acquaintances. We never got along. The only reason I'm here is to put him down like the traitor he is." Uriel said coolly and I stood up quickly. I had an idea about getting rid of Uriel, civilly.

"No one else talks to him." I said and took off down the hallway. I ran into Charlie on the way to the main plaza.

"Dean's in his room." She said and kept walking. It was weird how everyone just assumed I needed to see Dean. I made my way to Dean quickly. He was sitting and listening to music.

"Dean." I said and he jumped. He looked at me in fear for a second then it melted into a bright smile.

"Hey, Cas, you scared me." He said and stood up.

"I need a favor. It's important." I said urgently and his face darkened. He stepped closer and put a hand on my shoulder.

"Anything." He said quietly. I nodded.

"Outside the Angel hospitals are carts with metal pods. I need a few of those pods." I said and Dean frowned. I knew what I was asking him. I wanted him to go into the epicenter of an Angel's nest. "I know it's more than dangerous, but it's important." Dean kissed me quickly.

"I said anything, right?" He said and smiled. I pulled him closer and took it all in.

Uriel could compromise our hiding place, the only way to save the people I cared about was to get rid of Uriel. Without killing the innocent vessel. I had to teach the humans an important skill to win the war they were losing. And it goes against everything I've been taught.

_Sorry I killed Andy. What does Cas have to do? Find out next chapter, sweet readers._


	11. New Secrets

I took a deep breath and turned the corner to Uriel's cell. Sam straightened up from his leaning stance and stood in my way. I pushed past him and to Uriel. He looked up and grimaced, or it was a ghastly smile. I walked diligently up to him and backhanded him across the face. I heard him grunt and saw his blood run in strings from his lips.

"What I wouldn't do for some sustenance." Uriel coughed out. I grabbed his face and sighed, kneeling beside him.

"If I let you live, will you keep your secret about this place?" I asked. Uriel growled and lunged toward my face. My hand moved to his neck and I squeezed hard enough for him to stop struggling.

"I want to burn you, Castiel. I want to take all the scum you claim to love and burn all of them! In front of you while they scream for help." He snarled through the pressure I was putting on his throat. He was breathing heavily as I took my hand away. I could feel the anger radiating off him, I could feel anger in myself also. But I controlled it.

"I never wanted it to come to this...brother." I whispered shakily. I saw the confusion in his smoky brown eyes before I reached out with my grace and knocked him out. I stood up slowly and turned to Sam, who had been peeking around the corner.

"Do you miss him?" I asked Sam. He looked confused. "Your boyfriend, you miss him, yes?" Sam's eyes got darker as I asked the question.

"I would give up my soul to have him back again. I love him." He said seriously. I nodded and walked forward to put a hand on his shoulder. I motioned to Uriel.

"Take him to John." I said and went to keep walking but Sam stopped me. He clutched my arm as he started to shake.

"What are you going to do, Cas?" He asked. His light brown eyes shone with, what? Understanding? Horror? I gently removed his hand.

"I'm getting you the love of your life back." I said and Sam's eyes got misty. And before I knew what was happening he had wrapped me in a large hug. His dominating frame encompassing me completely. I gently patted his back as I felt the sobs wrench his body. I smiled and reached out to him with my grace, soothing him back into a normal state. He stepped back with a sheepish look on his face and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Thanks. It's just...I haven't seen him in so long." Sam said and I smiled. I nodded towards Uriel and Sam set to work as I left.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Uriel was laid out on one of the cold metal tables, unconscious, in John's makeshift clinic. Bobby, Sam, Dean, John, and I were the only ones here. Everyone else was banned from coming, by my orders. I slowly addressed the only four people I trusted.

"What I'm about to do goes against everything that I believe in. It is not to be used unprofessionally." I warned. I held my hand out to Dean and he handed me a metal pod. I took it gently and it glowed as it touched my skin. They all looked on in wonder. I motioned for them to come closer and they gathered around the metal table. I laid my hand over the metallic pod and it opened smoothly to reveal a small, milky white ball. They looked at it curiously, especially Dean, whose bright green eyes lit up in amazement at the object.

"Scalpel?" I asked John and he handed me the silver instrument. Sam turned Uriel's head to the side for me, exposing his neck. I looked up to see if they were watching, they were, with rapt attention. I gently pressed the scalpel to the skin on Uriel's neck, making a small, thin cut. I held the white ball close to the small wound and everyone's eyes widened as thin blue lines spread from the cut.

"It's going to get brighter." I said absently and I saw them all squint as the blue smoke-like tendrils started to light up. As soon as the wisps touched the white ball a hole opened up and the smoke disappeared inside. When it had all gathered inside it shut tightly and I placed it carefully in the original metal pod. I looked at the others and saw the wonder on their faces.

"Now, that was cool." Dean piped up and I smiled shyly. I looked at the others to see their reactions when John's stare pinned me down.

"Castiel, can I speak to you? Alone?" I looked to Dean, he looked confused, and waved him off. I followed John to another cell along the clinic hallway. He turned on me as soon as we entered, blocking the cell entrance and trapping me inside.

"Why are you showing us this, Castiel? What pushed you to this?" He asked and I opened my mouth to speak when he cut me off. "And don't lie to me, son. I've heard enough lies to dig me a grave four times over." I looked at him openly, trying to keep the emotions swirling in me away from the surface.

"I would never lie to you, sir. Respectively." I said coldly. John stepped closer and I tensed, anticipating an attack. John must have seen my reaction because he stepped back just a little. I looked at him squarely and he must have seen something in my eyes because his mouth dropped open in a way that I had never seen.

"You never intended to stay did you? Right? You were just gonna leave, right?" John hissed. I stepped closer to him and he closed his mouth. The anger didn't leave his eyes though.

"I was planning on staying. Then I realized I was dangerous. I had someone try to kill me, everyone hates me and my kind. I'm starting fights between you people when you should be banded together." I took a deep breath to stop myself from raising my voice, John shook his head.

"Castiel, you're focussing only on the bad things. You helped us. You helped my boys, it takes a lot to do that. You just showed us how to free Angels from human hosts, for Christ's sake!" John sounded different as he tried to reason with me. _He doesn't understand, I don't want to leave but I have to. To protect Dean from other Angels. And to protect myself from losing him._

"I led an Angel to the only safe place you have left, without even knowing it." I said plainly and John's features hardened. It was my final statement. John opened his mouth to talk but I held up a hand.

"People can mourn the loss of another life, as I'm doing with Amelia's passing. Some will mourn me and they will move on. You now know how to save humans safely while protecting my kind." I put a hand on his arm and he jumped slightly. "You must promise to never hurt my kind in any unnecessary form. Promise." I said and John nodded, he was beginning to comprehend what I was doing.

"This is something that never leaves this room. It's our secret, no one else needs to know." Then I paused and asked, " Is it too much to ask that you be the one to kill me?" I asked and John looked terrified. But, once again, he saw something in my eyes and shook his head.

"Just remember, I will never forgive you for breaking Dean this way." He threatened but I paid no attention. My heart felt it though.

"I'm truly sorry...John." I said and pushed past him. He stayed where he was, deep in thought. I returned to Dean, he asked me what had happened and I told him it was nothing. I could sense the doubt in his mind. Then Uriel's vessel started to stir, he had survived. The man slowly sat up and flexed his hands, looking at them in amazement.

"I'm actually back." He said plainly. I looked at Dean's face as it had that look of silent amusement, the kind I had learned that Dean always showed. Then his green eyes met mine and I saw, just for a second, blue smoke curl its way around his pupil then it was gone. It shook something inside me but I pushed it away. There was no time to mourn for something that wasn't mine.

"Kind of cowardly, Castiel. Is that what I taught you?" The ancient voice, from when we captured Uriel, sounded out in the room. I looked at the others but they hadn't seemed to have heard it. I looked around and saw a person standing in the shadow. I felt my eyes widen as I took in the person's appearance. The man stood about my height, similar clothes to mine, but even dressed like that I knew who it was. The brown hair with a deep amber glow and deep grey eyes could be seen even from my distance. He tilted his head.

"Michael." I whispered.


	12. The End?

"What did ya say?" Dean asked me as I openly stared at Michael. I shook myself out of it and smiled at Dean.

"Nothing." I said and walked out. I heard footsteps behind me, they weren't Dean's. They followed me until I got to my old cell. No one would hear me talking in there. I turned around and came face to face with my older brother. The one that had taught me everything when I was a younger Angel. The only one still living on our home planet, controlling everything.

"You're not real." I said simply. Michael would never leave his home. Not even for his next of kin. Unlike all the other Angels, Michael and I were related by blood. The other Angels were made by our father after we were born.

"Of course I'm not real. I'm in your head and I think we both know why. Because I know." Michael said seriously but he shined with joy and radiance. "I'm your voice of reason, Castiel." He whispered and stepped forward to put a hand on the side of my face. His touch was warm and distant, it made me sigh out of sadness and longing. I stepped away and his face fell.

"Why would you be my voice of reason?" I asked and he seemed to ponder this question.

"Well, I _am_ your older brother and superior, for one. Plus, I _was _always the one who knew best, you had too much heart. Like you do right now." Michael said as he started to circle me, "You think you're doing what's best for the people you care about but it's just going to tear them apart. Like Uriel wanted to do to you." I stiffened.

"I led Uriel here, I put these people in danger. I deserve to be killed for just that." I argued but I was fighting against myself, I'd never done that. Michael shook his head.

"Unknowingly, Castiel. You didn't know the GPS had a track-"

"It's common sense!" I yelled at Michael and his mouth snapped shut. "They probably all have trackers in them to find the vehicle if it is lost or stolen. I should have thought about it. I was too hasty." I rubbed my face and my stubble scratched my hand. I waited for awhile to calm myself down.

"I'm going through with it." I said simply and walked past the hallucination.

"Then I'm going be with you the whole time, trying to convince you otherwise." Michael warned and I turned to him. He looked at me and smiled. "Can't let my little brother die alone. What kind of brother would I be?" I nodded but I knew I was trying to comfort myself in the face of death. I walked out of the cell to the main plaza, no footsteps followed me this time. I saw Dean and walked up to him, he had the gear for a raid on his shoulder.

"Raid?" I asked and figured this was the best opportunity to get my death over with. Dean nodded vigorously and smiled.

"New supplies came to the hospital and they overstocked as usual. We're gonna grab some pods and some Angels. But don't worry, strict instructions from dad to not hurt them." I sighed in relief at John's instructions and threaded my fingers through Dean's. He smiled bigger and squeezed my hand.

"Get a room you two." Sam groaned and Dean grinned wickedly. He reached out and locked his hand on the back of my neck. He immediately attached our lips together and I heard Sam groan in annoyance.

"Seriously?" Sam asked Dean when we had pulled away from each other. I blushed but kept my hold on Dean's hand.

"You're going to miss that, aren't you?" I heard Michael ask and I tensed. Squeezing Dean's hand tightly.

"Cas, what's wrong?" I heard Dean ask then Michael was right in front of me. He grinned wickedly. "You're going to miss everything about him. His smell, his touch, the way he treats you like you're the only one in this messed up world that fully understands him. Why give that up, Castiel?" Michael hissed. He was completely different from just minutes ago._ Internal conflict_. I flinched at his words and pulled away from Dean.

"Cas, are you okay? Come on, talk to me." Dean pleaded and I looked at him. I would miss him the most, everything about him that I...loved. My eyes widened in shock as it set in. Dean was frantic. The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"I love you." I said and he stopped completely. He looked like he was frozen in time. I remember once that Sam said Dean wasn't good at expressing his feelings at the best of times and never at the worst. I wished he would say it back to me so I could die peacefully. Then his features soften to the point I barely recognized him and he smiled lazily.

"Love you too, Cas." He said and I felt a piece of me snap in place while another fell out. Dean loved me back and he would be heartbroken. I pulled him into a hug for one last time before he headed off with Sam on the hospital raid.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I rushed to John as fast as I could. I found him looking over some notes at his desk and he looked up when I flew in.

"We need to do this now." I ordered and he stood quickly. He gave me the look to say I didn't have to do this. "I'm going to do this no matter what." I warned and John's face closed off from all emotion. I took my shirt off quickly to allow better access to my neck and John started cleaning his tools. I looked over to him.

"Will you keep your promise?" I asked and John looked back at me. He huffed.

"I hate you for doing this to my boys and everyone else but I know you got your reasons and I've got mine. So, yeah, I'll keep my promise." John reassured me and I took a deep breath. Then Amelia was standing beside me. She reached down and grazed her fingertips over my cheek and a tear slid down from her eyes.

"Sweet, Castiel. Too much heart, was your problem, and your fears, no one could quell them." She sighed and leaned down and kissed my forehead, her touch light and barely there. Her voice seemed so out of place. Then she was gone.

"Jimmy can finally be put to rest." I whispered. Michael appeared by my side and frowned down at me.

"Dying for nothing." He hissed but I smiled up at him and his features changed. They became kinder and gentler, more like the brother I used to know.

"Dying for love." I whispered and then John was above me.

"I'm gonna have to knock you out, okay?" I nodded and he placed a cloth over my mouth and nose. A sickly sweet scent stuck in my nose as I faded.

_Some creatures I make may be more wonderful or beautiful than others but I love all of my creations equally, son. Never forget that, Castiel, for I will love you no matter what you do. Even if you were to love something or someone more than me, I will always love _you.


End file.
